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bespectacledbisexual:

i like that we say “oh, man” to express disappointment

because men are disappointing

Niggas in Paris by Jay-Z and Kanye West from the album: Watch the Throne

Jay-Z and Kanye West | Niggas in Paris

To all the Tumblr users who tend to use tags very liberally:

thejadedkiwano:

Let’s play a game.

Type the following words into your tags box, then post the first automatic tag that comes up.

you, also, what, when, why, how, look, because, never

Today I called a depression hotline
Because I was awake before the sun and
Nobody else was.
A woman on the other end answered.
Just before I opened my mouth
I thought about if anyone ever thought to
Ask them if they were alright.
So I did.
Over the phone I could almost hear her smile as she said
“I’m doing just fine.”

I’ve been conditioned to hold my breath
When I walk by cemeteries or
When ambulances pass by.
Sometimes it is not always beauty that robs your lungs.

In the 5th grade I accidentally broke a boy’s finger.
I feel guilty about it still.

I’ve been single for almost a decade.
When I was telling my friend about
Another botched attempt at getting close with a girl she said
“You’re too soft for a man. You’re too nice.
Girls want to hug boys like you, not kiss them.”

I can’t help that my arms tremble when I hold someone,
I don’t want to break something so precious.
I can’t help that I cry more out of love than I do sadness.

I am not a shell, I am not steel.
My skin is dark but it is not rough.
My body writes checks out to any homeless heart.
My lips bruise trying to talk people into sleep.
I am soft, I am tender.

“You’re Too Soft For A Man.” ” - Nishat Ahmed

(via sickwithsyllables)

It’s for the people who steal the stereos for dodgy resale :)

That makes a lot of sense! I don’t know why I didn’t think about people taking just the stereo. I should’ve realised that, pretty ashamed that I didn’t. Thank you very much!

One of the things I discovered when I installed the new battery in my mum’s car is that if you disconnect/reconnect the power, you have to enter a security code on the radio to be able to use it again. No code required to be able to start the car or anything, you can still drive around fine. It’s just for the radio.

Why, exactly? What purpose does this serve? If a thief came along and messed with the power and got the car to start then at least they wouldn’t be able to speed away to some sweet tunes?

If you’re installing a new car battery for your mum, do make sure that the spanner you’re in the middle of using to screw in one of the terminals doesn’t make contact with another metallic engine component.

Because, uh, it’ll spark and smoke and you’ll yell “SHIT!” and you’ll definitely be awake after that.

yessss and when the fish falls on morgan and abbi

Also “go fuck your brother” AND SHE ACTUALLY DOES. GREATEST COMEDY EVER.

The entire episode and everything about it is perfect. I laugh at it all no matter how much I re-watch it.